vows

This post is going to be pretty long, but I thought it might be helpful for anyone who is looking for help with their vows. Our officiant, Eva Stramer Nichols, sent us some ideas and we really liked the Buddhist vows. We made some minor modifications and added a honey ritual too. We are more spiritual than religious, so it worked perfectly for us. Eva did a fantastic job as the officiant.



Here goes...

Introduction


Today, Troy and Liana promise to dedicate themselves completely to each other, with body, speech, and mind.

In this life, in every situation, in wealth or poverty, in health or sickness, in happiness or difficulty, they will work to help each other perfectly.

The purpose of their relationship will be to attain enlightenment by perfecting their kindness and compassion toward all sentient beings.

Marriage is the vehicle to practice serving others. It is a practice ground. Love is wishing others happiness.

Marriage is the equal commitment to the happiness of your partner, toward their awakening.

Our inner potential is developed through taking on challenges, not just through joy.

We need people in order to practice compassion.

Since their marriage is dedicated toward the happiness of all living beings, those gathered here are the representatives of all living beings.

Readings

Reading from the Little Prince – Ashlee, groom's niece
Reading “Falling in Love is Like Owning a Dog” by Taylor Mali – Kyle, man of honor

Honey Ritual

Eva (Ordained Minister):
“Honey is a symbol of the sweetness in life. And so, with this honey, we proclaim this day as a day of great joy and celebration – a day to remember – Your Day. We thank you, Mother Earth, for creating this divine substance, and ask you to bless it, even as you will bless this holy union.”

[Groom feeds honey to bride; bride feeds honey to groom]

“As together you now share this honey, so may you, under Mother Earth’s guidance, in perfect love and devotion to each other, share your lives together, and thereby may you find life’s joys doubly gladdening, its bitterness sweetened, and all things hallowed by time, companionship and love.”

Vows
Eva (Ordained Minister):

Troy and Liana are happy today not only because they can share the joy of their love for each other with friends and family, but also because they have the opportunity to express their aspirations for the future.

Troy and Liana, do you pledge to help each other to develop your hearts and minds, cultivating compassion, generosity, ethics, patience, enthusiasm, concentration and wisdom as you age and undergo the various ups and downs of life and to transform them into the path of love, compassion, joy and equanimity?
Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Recognizing that the external conditions in life will not always be smooth and that internally your own minds and emotions will sometimes get stuck in negativity. Do you pledge to see all these circumstances as a challenge to help you grow, to open your hearts, to accept yourselves, and each other; and to generate compassion for others who are suffering? Do you pledge to avoid becoming narrow, closed or opinionated, and to help each other to see various sides of situations?

Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Understanding that just as we are a mystery to ourselves, each other person is also a mystery to us. Do you pledge to seek to understand yourselves, each other, and all living beings, to examine your own minds continually and to regard all the mysteries of life with curiosity and joy?

Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Do you pledge to preserve and enrich your affection for each other, and to share it with all beings? To take the loving feelings you have for one another and your vision of each other's potential and inner beauty as an example and rather than spiraling inwards and becoming self absorbed, to radiate this love outwards to all beings?

Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
When it comes time to part, do you pledge to look back at your time together with joy--joy that you met and shared what you have--and acceptance that we cannot hold on to anything forever?

Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Do you pledge to remember the disadvantages of ignorance, anger and clinging attachment, to apply antidotes when these arise in your minds, and to remember the kindness of all other beings and your connection to them? Do you pledge to work for the welfare of others, with all of your compassion, wisdom and skill?

Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Do you pledge to work to develop the wisdom understanding the relative functioning nature of things and the wisdom knowing their deeper way of existence that they are empty of inherent existence? And to remember the laws of cause and effect?

Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Do you pledge day to day, to be patient with yourselves and others, knowing that change comes slowly and gradually?

Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Do you pledge to maintain the awareness that all things are temporary, and to remain optimistic that you can achieve your greatest potential and lasting happiness.

Bride & Groom: "We do”

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Will all of you witnessing this wedding do all in your power to uphold Troy and Liana in their marriage?

People: We will.

Eva (Ordained Minister):
Exchanging of Rings

“The wedding ring is the outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual bond which unites two loyal hearts in partnership.”

Pronouncement and Blessing

May your home be filled with laughter and the warm embrace of a summer day. May you find peacefulness and beauty, challenge, and satisfaction, humor and insight, healing and renewal, love and wisdom, as in a quiet heart._May you always feel that what you have is enough. I now pronounce you Husband and Wife. You may kiss the bride.

Presenting and Congratulating the Couple

“Ladies and Gentlemen please join me in congratulating Troy and Liana.”